Curse

Aalric · Jun 19, 2005, 04:56 PM // 16:56

Someone asks you to do a job for him. You decline, telling him the experience award isn't good enough.

You get fired from your job. You say to your boss, "No problem, what's the quest to change my profession?"

You become a shopkeeper. You start selling things for a ridiculously high price. When asked why you are so expensive, you reply, "They're from the Underworld."

A man tries to mug you. You stand still for a couple of minutes, trying to charm him.

You go to a night club and don't dance at all. When asked why, you reply, "I'm an elementalist, my dance is stupid."

Sorry that these aren't as funny as the first ones, it's the best I could come up with.

oostdyk · Jun 19, 2005, 04:57 PM // 16:57

I often find myself classing the things people say as taunts into the various classes and profession combinations. Like, when somebody starts making derogatory remarks, I tend to suddenly think of a mesmer, and how to avoid getting caught in their web of counters.

Also, I sometimes start thinking and talking in terms of energy or health regeneration...

I once had the same kind of thing when I had been playing morrowind for a week straight with a friend. We went to get some stuff at the store, and the bag was so full, the bread at the top was getting squeezed.

My friend turned to me and shouted: "Dude, the bread is taking damage!"

great stuff...

ZenBoy · Jun 19, 2005, 05:03 PM // 17:03

Those are pretty good guys

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sagius Truthbarron

One day I was out driving somewhere and didn't know exactly where I was, needed to get to an exit out of the town I was in, so I actually went to press the 'M' key. True story, though, I was playing Battlefield 1942 when this happend and not GW.

Um... do you carry something around with an 'M' key on it when you are driving? Just happen to have a spare keyboard in your back pocket? ha.

oostdyk · Jun 19, 2005, 05:05 PM // 17:05

LoL, yeh... a general habit of keyboard users...

Having the feeling to type out the things your saying, getting an itchy feeling in your fingers whilst talking. Or the tendancy to hit TAB when trying to switch the person you're talking to in a conversation.

Aalric · Jun 19, 2005, 05:09 PM // 17:09

Thought of some more, though once again, they aren't that funny.

You get attacked by a gang of yobs. The ambulance comes for you, but you tell them to wait, your health regeneration will soon kick in.

A bunch of Mafia walk in to work. You tell your colleauges to hold them off so you can cast Meteor Shower on them.

You decide to go off to London for a trip. You stand on top of a building and shout, "LFG FOR EXPLORATION TO NEXT MISSION!"

You find a junk yard full of old metal bits. You walk into a shop and ask for an expert salvage kit to make some crafting material.

You are trying to sell something. When the person says he's not interested, you say, "But it's gold! And look at all these nice mods!"...

Red Locust · Jun 19, 2005, 05:26 PM // 17:26

haha these are good so far

- You go to a club, stand there with one finger pointing towards the ceiling, and start thrusting in the general direction of the ladies.

Sekkira · Jun 19, 2005, 05:53 PM // 17:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aalric

You decide to go off to London for a trip. You stand on top of a building and shout, "LFG FOR EXPLORATION TO NEXT MISSION!"

You know, when I travel international any time in my life, I'm going to do that to every country I visit. I'll also make sure someone is filming for your veiwing pleasure

Numa Pompilius · Jun 19, 2005, 06:05 PM // 18:05

Quote:

You go to a club, stand there with one finger pointing towards the ceiling, and start thrusting in the general direction of the ladies.

You're not supposed to do that?

How about...

...You look at a map, and get confused: you've never been to Beijing, so howcome it's visible? And why doesn't anything happen when you click it?!

...You try to sell a flower you've found to the clerk at 7-11...

...and you want "five gold" for it...

...but it turns out the useless guy doesn't even sell identification kits?

...You report Gwen missing to the Police, telling them she's not been seen since Searing.
("She's about 7. No, it's not my child, but I've bee travelling with her quite a lot, and I'm worried the Charr might've killed her. Charr. Big guys. Looks like dogs, but walks on two legs. Carries swords and shields and stuff. What? I'm feeling fine, why do you ask?")

...You realize that the prick driving that SUV who cut you off at the parking lot is somehow immune to your Vampiric Gaze.

Aalric · Jun 19, 2005, 07:31 PM // 19:31

Thought of more.

You go to an archaeological dig. You look around for anything with runes on, then futilely try to put in it your clothing.

A man comes over to you and asks if you want to become a farmer. You answer back, "Sorry mate, it's been nerfed".

You walk into an academy and proclaim, "I'm level three, I've got two proffessions - let's blow up the world!"

Youi walk into work one day and shout out, "Wtb:max damge sword - paying well!"

You spend an entire day searching the city. Finally, you get fed up, walk into the Mayor's office and demand, "This city has a bug! Where are the henchmen?!"

You become President. Your speech for the changes you will make is as follows: "Due to recent complaints, I will make the following changes: I will make the Elementalist dance nicer, I will un-nerf farming, I will make the cost to enter Fissure of Woe or the Underworld only 500 gold, and I will make better music!"

A man comes over to rob you. You tell him, "Hold on, let me take a screenshot."

You walk into a tailors house. You dump a whole load of scales and cloth on his table and tell him you want the Pyromancer's robe. He tells you you will look nuts in it until you give him the 1500 gold.

You write a play, using words such as, 'Brb, w8, wts, Lfg,' etc. When the play gets messed up, you burst on stage and start shouting, "NOOB! NOOB! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! WE'LL HAVE TO START THE MISSION AGAIN!" You also include a huge amount of swearing in your littanny.

You are found wrapped up in a map. When asked what happened, you reply, "I was trying to travel to a city."

You go to a cinema. When you are told to pay, you protest, "I'm a monk! I don't pay!"

You get fired. You shout at your boss, "That's it! I'm banning your account!"

You start shouting in town, "Need members for group. One memner (me) already, cool cape, willing to do Hall of Heroes, what more could you ask for?! Need members for group!"

Sorry it's this long.

Tometheus · Jun 19, 2005, 08:59 PM // 20:59

I dropped my cutting board with all of my food on it on the floor while I was preparing breakfast this morning (nearly impaling my toe with the knife) and found myself shouting 'Grawl Damnit'.... it took me a few seconds to realize that's not the usual exclamation.

Itbegins · Jun 19, 2005, 09:19 PM // 21:19

i find i have played a game to much when i cant go anywhere without thinking about elements of the game such as Diablo 2 .......when going to school i would pretty much just think about how people around me had shitty resistance and would have to just take my dmg and cry.....when telling your teacher when they hand back a good test score GG and them ask you what GG means and you dont even think but respond Nub that was fun........now with guild wars ill find shit layin around my house and my mom will say pick it up and what do i respond with no joke "That garbage is reserved for Kyle (my bro)" she asked what and i just ignore her i mean i guess she cant understand that its reserved i cant pick that shit up

Divinitys Creature · Jun 20, 2005, 03:04 AM // 03:04

Here's my attempt:

You run to the bathroom, knocking people over on the way even the old lady and knock over carts of people selling mellons and other round, rolly-about-slippy fruits, leaving chaos in your wake, you enter the bathroom, you know it's No1.........

Damn i haven't "unlocked" the elite skill: unlock zipper - facilitates bathroom use, cost 10 energy, cast 0.25 s, recharge 60.

Needless to say you need to pay a trip to the armor crafter shortly afterwards.

edit----------this is TOTALLY IMAGINARY---NOT BASED ON REAL EVENTS

Cnegurozka · Jun 20, 2005, 11:30 AM // 11:30

Best things happened to me in RL:
(1)
Stopped playing Diablo II for a short snack in the kitchen, i was standing there eating. I realized i was alone and i thought "Damnit! The fu*** Merc died again!" (Mercs are computer controlled guys that follow and help you, like a henchmen thats a pet)

(2)
I was playing much RTCW: ET (Team oriented Shooter in WW 2) that time, i was walking down the street i saw 3 ppl in a house behind a opened window and i thought "Damn, i should have taken the Panzerfaust, easy 3 frags with 1 shoot".

Thats about the worst things happened to me due to too much gaming. (Besides the no-normal-friends stuff etc. ~~)

Aalric · Jun 20, 2005, 01:25 PM // 13:25

Thought of an interesting one.

You are the manager of a large business. One day, you come into work and start handing out Korean - English dictionaries to your workers. One of them asks what it's for. You reply, "Well, we're moving the firm to Korea, so I thought we should learn to speak Korean." "Why are we going to Korea?" "Easy - the Koreans win more often, so we can go to the Underworld more often." Your workers look at you in shock, "Underworld?! You're a crook?!" You stare at them in genuine amazement. "A crook?! Me?! Why would you think that? All I do is I go into the Underworld, kill some guys, rob them of their loot, and sell it for high prices." Your workers go to the phone. "That's it. We're calling the police!" Why?", you ask. "What have I done wrong?! It's perfectly simple. I start a war between America, Europe and Korea, the winner gets into the Underworld, and since Korea wins so often, I'll be able to go to the Underworld more often." Hearing this, your workers decide to call the United States army instead. Those not calling remark, "Wow! Not only is he a terrorist, he's absolutely nuts. He thinks Korea's army is better than that of the USA!"

Paladin_Adoni · Jun 20, 2005, 02:53 PM // 14:53

HAHAH lol

You arrive at work and approach your boss

"What quest would you have for me today?"

raising one eye-brow, your boss pauses for a moment, and gives you the task for the day.

you turn around and just stand there.
you boss asks, "What ARE you doing?"

to which you reply "Just getting my skills prepared, formulating a strategy"

although again strange, your boss leaves you too it.

finally you head out of the office.

every 5-10 minutes you walk back into your bosses office and just stand there for a short while, before walking back out.

on the 5th return your boss stops you and asks "What exactly ARE you doing? why do you keep coming back into my office?"

to which you angrily reply "I swear, Anet nerfed the copy room. the fax AND the photocopier have disenchant. whenever I go to use my Skill of Technology use. they break it and I can get the photocopier to work! no matter what skills I take in I cant win. thats it Anet has gone too far. I QUIT!"

and you storm out the door.

Sun Warrior · Jun 20, 2005, 04:23 PM // 16:23

#9 and #10 actually sound useful in real life. think up 8 good qualities about yourself and focus on those for the day. if that doesnt turn out good, no big deal. pick another 8 the next day.

eventhorizen · Jun 20, 2005, 06:13 PM // 18:13

---Your late for work because you couldnt find the office on the map and had to walk

---You start tuanting this big guy in the pub, then realise you dont have empathy with you...

--- You think your dog is bugged when it doesnt attack the can your throwing stones at in the woods

---Hammer bash doesnt work on the guy who always manages to get in front of you for the queue at the canteen

Tyil Thunder Arrow · Jun 20, 2005, 06:32 PM // 18:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by eventhorizen

---Your late for work because you couldnt find the office on the map and had to walk

---You start tuanting this big guy in the pub, then realise you dont have empathy with you...

then try to bargain with him only to realize you didn't equip pacifism

Adaria · Jun 20, 2005, 06:57 PM // 18:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by oostdyk

I often find myself classing the things people say as taunts into the various classes and profession combinations. Like, when somebody starts making derogatory remarks, I tend to suddenly think of a mesmer, and how to avoid getting caught in their web of counters.

Also, I sometimes start thinking and talking in terms of energy or health regeneration...

I once had the same kind of thing when I had been playing morrowind for a week straight with a friend. We went to get some stuff at the store, and the bag was so full, the bread at the top was getting squeezed.

My friend turned to me and shouted: "Dude, the bread is taking damage!"great stuff...

Oh my gods I busted up laughing with a snort or two on that, oh man, thats awesomely funny.

This is sort of unrelated but has anyone been typing on GW, or on a messenger, and someone says something to you? You read what someone said and try to reply verbally to the person talking to you, instead you get a garbled mixture, or in my case, I said what I was going to reply to thep erson on the computer and it sounded all strained and odd, it was hilarious o_o;

This happen to anyone oddly enough? I mean that would be funny if you suddenly shouted "I'm attacking Char Chaot!" or something instead of how you were supposed to verbally reply.

Tyil Thunder Arrow · Jun 20, 2005, 07:04 PM // 19:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by oostdyk

My friend turned to me and shouted: "Dude, the bread is taking damage!"

now that some funny @#$&